I recently read an article online called “Men’s Levels Of Attraction” by Olusegun Mokuolu. I don’t know exactly how I came across it but it was rather intriguing. The article stated that a man goes through four levels (stages) of attraction and just like in women, age also affects how men are attracted to women. It then goes on to explain the four levels in detail.
In an earlier post of the same title, I regaled you with a delightful story about one of my friends attempting to set me up with someone. In that article I spoke about my views on that actually initially attracts us – the appearance. Face it. They say that men are the ones who are mostly attracted by the appearance, but lets be honest, that is about the same for women as well; even if they don’t want to admit it. 😉
I didn’t get much response on that post, but with the number of followers going up, I can guess that quite a few have read it. Close friends who did read the article, agreed with my concept.
The article was mean’t to be single page on the topic; just my awkwardly stamped conclusion on the laws of attraction. However, recent events have me looking at it again; sparking up in what may or may not be a series.
The past couple of days, yours truly has been the recipient of some attention. Now the moment I receive any message on Facebook or an email from any member of the opposite sex, I do look at it with extreme caution.
There are a whole load of internet scammers and con-artists out there ready to scrounge every last cent from the average Joe. I’m sure that most of you would have received such emails or if you looked in your spam folder will get a glimpse of them.
Myself, I’m cautious when any woman I’ve never met sees a picture of me and calls me ‘handsome’. No one has ever used more than one syllable to describe me. I’m not bitter about it, just accepting of the facts. I do try to look my best. However all this is funny now that I think about it. A couple of years ago I couldn’t care less what I looked like. For all I know I look like Quasimodo and I would be OK with it. Then I fell for the girl in the office and somehow I had the need to be the best that I could be, looks and all. Anyways, I’m digressing from the actual topic.
I received an email one day from a girl. Without getting into specifics into what was said in the email, it was someone looking to start a relationship with me. To be honest, at first it sounded more like an ad for a mail-order bride or even worse, one of those scams on the web. Normally I would put this in the spam folder and forget about it, but something inside told me it was something worth reading and so I did. It was a heartfelt letter with picture of herself attached. I would say this about her; WOW.
As you can imagine, my 1st instinct is to dismiss this completely as hoax or scam, but I somehow felt the need to reply. So I did. I replied her stating that I wasn’t interested in becoming anything more than a friend to her and I sincerely hoped that this wasn’t some kind of scam. The next day I received an email from her holding an A4 piece of paper with my email address handwritten with a pen. From that day on, we have been exchanging emails.
About the same day that I received the email, I also befriended someone on Facebook. Recently she too mentioned that she was having feelings for me. Again I had to ask that we remain as friends. I’m glad to say that we still are very good friends and hope our friendship grows.
The point of this post is about what I mentioned at the very beginning; Olusegun’s article.
Its not that I did not find either of these women attractive. They are extremely smart and beautiful women. Any man should consider themselves crazy to not want to be in a relationship with either of them. I was actually extremely flattered that they would even consider me.
However on reading the article, I began an introspective into where was I. Made me ask a few questions. I began to wonder that with all the women on my Facebook, am I at Level 2? Do I look at women as objects to conquer? More importantly, when it comes to the girl at the office, what level am I when it comes to her?
I have to think whether I’m rejecting the idea of being with anyone else out of stupidity and determination or whether it is a matter of fate.
According to Olusegun, any man can easily swing between one level in a backward and forward movement. That would certainly explain some things.
One thing is clear. If I have to move on from the girl in the office, it will be the hardest thing I would ever have to do. To the other women in my life I find attractive and intriguing, I vow to be honest in my intentions.